The broken sufferer lives in solitude much of the time. Pain, emotional or physical, intensifies the loneliness. Yet, I’ve found, in the throes of spasms or in despair, though I am lonely I want no company.
So much isolation lends itself to depression. The sense of void is a virtual playground for the devil. Myopia, morbidity, and malaise crowd the bed and the head.
Into this tunnel, the Rescuer whispers Hope. Even when the pain pounds and the darkness drones, an invitation to enter a new glory hovers. It is delivered by a host of angelic messengers, which only the sufferer hears. This spiritual rescue is not a delusion; it is a Calling - an invitation to visit the Glory of God.
Lying limp on my bed, my head ensconced in pillows, and electrodes burrowing into my war torn back, I’ve wondered if I’ll ever recover. How could I go back to “normal life? When the pain wanes, I become calm, movement returns and reality as I knew it enters my thoughts. But at first my spirit lingers. I feel a difference in my soul, and I sense the presence of God around me. I do not want to join others, resume my activities - fold laundry, empty the dishwasher, walk my dog - or take a shower and start over. I do not want to forget that I have been broken.
In his timeless book, “The Wounded Healer“, Henri Nouwen writes, “…perhaps the painful awareness of loneliness is an invitation to transcend our limitations and look beyond the boundaries of our existence.”
As Christians committed to serving Christ by ministering to others as He did, we must suffer afflictions that take us away from this world and into the depths of our souls. Here in this crucible we face our fears, sorrows, and failings. Jesus walks through every cracked door with us, and welcomes us as His - saved, comforted, and adored. These are the gifts, dear sufferers, we bring into the world where people in darkness, pain, and loneliness cry out for compassion.
Pain offers an invitation into the courts of the King. Since he uses all things, including afflictions, for good, we can find purpose in our wretched wounding. To be invited into His courts is to be welcomed into the presence of His Son, Jesus Christ, who sits at His right hand. Here mysterious glories are revealed as our senses heighten in awareness of His presence in all things. Our brokenness is beautiful to our suffering Savior.
“Oh how I love Your dwelling place, O Lord of hosts. My soul longs, yes faints for Your courts.”Psalm 84:1)
In pain is the gift of an Invitation.